Demon Chocolate's Return

Well, this week I tried again to eat trail mix, and found I still could not just leave it alone after a few bites.  The trail mix I bought was 50 calories per tablespoon, so I couldn't eat very much of it without going overboard.  But having it sitting there in my cubicle, I just kept going back to it until I found and ate all the chocolate candy pieces and the almonds and the cranberries--the stuff I liked. I did finally throw the peanuts and raisins away.  But I'm sure my "experiment" amounted to 300 or more extra calories consumed.

But it wasn't just the calories; it was the loss of control and the unhappy realization that I can't just lightly snack on anything that has chocolate candy in it.  I also had a piece of Indian New Year coffee cake that one of my coworkers brought in. It was good, and I didn't feel out of control eating it, but it was extra.  Plus, this week I didn't exercise every day as I usually do, so it's no wonder I gained almost a pound.

Apparently, I'm still at the lowest coping level with chocolate candy: Level VII - Avoiding or eliminating the stimulus.  Will it ever change?  I don't know, but I guess I need to stop testing myself until I'm really ready to take on the challenge, using Shirley Simon's zeroing-in technique. 

Shirley's technique with cherry pie (her nemesis) was to very gradually ascend through the coping levels, from highest to lowest: 

I. Face to face without any help
II. Face to face under safe conditions
III. Competing response: keep your hands busy
IV.  Competing response: keep your mouth busy
V.  Competing response: eat the right food
VI.  Making the stimulus hard to get
VII.  Avoiding or eliminating the stimulus

She started out at level VII and then gradually took on cherry pie at the various levels: bringing it into the house but not eating it, and showing that she could be around the pie by doing other things such as eating fruit or drinking coffee. When she finally reached level I, she could eat a small piece of pie and not eat any more of it, in private with no help from hubby.

Do I want to have that kind of control over chocolate candy? It would mean having only one piece of chocolate a week, for instance.  Right now I'm thinking, what's the point?  But that says to me that chocolate is not food, it's a drug, since the only way to consume it is to overconsume it to obtain whatever effect it provides. Can one obtain that effect from just one piece of chocolate?  That's a good question.  But a better one is: Why risk it?

It's like the question of drinking coffee with caffeine or not, or even drinking coffee at all. There are benefits to caffeine; it stimulates the brain and possibly the metabolism.  Coffee tastes good, even if it's decaffeinated. But the consequences for me are an increase in heart flutters and a painful bladder.  I don't know if the benefits outweigh the harms. 

If I ask the same question about chocolate, what do I answer?  Benefits: good feeling, taste bud pleasure.  Harms: eat too much and gain weight, put too much fat into body, hurt bladder.  If I could eat just a little chocolate, would I get the same amount of benefit? I don't think so.  I suspect that the benefit comes from eating a lot of chocolate.  As it turns out, people have done studies on that question (mostly funded by candy companies). Here's one website's review of the chocolate research: Chocolate's Potential Health Benefits.

I found the word "potential" in the title to be important because when I look at the research as a whole, the results are inconclusive, and there still lingers the question of how much chocolate is enough.  If the amount that produces benefits will also produce obesity and fat-related illnesses, is it worth it? And if the benefit-producing amount is small, can a chocolate-addicted person stop at that amount?

I think I'll just stick with other healthy foods for now and leave chocolate alone. Maybe someday I'll take it on and get to coping level one. In the meantime . . .

I'm hoping to have a less challenging week coming up.  Wish me luck.

The March Madness Challenge

This week was challenging because of March Madness Wings Day at work.  I was in charge of making it happen, which meant that I had to order the wings we'd be eating. Of course, I had to ensure they tasted good, so I tried some the day before, and then I had to eat some at the luncheon, too. And when there were leftover wings, I had to take some home because I knew how much they cost and didn't want to waste any (sound familiar?).

Well, with so many excuses for eating wings, of course I got to eat quite a few this week. I don't think it hurt my diet too much in terms of calories, but in terms of reviving old cravings, the fatty wings created some problems.  I found myself wanting to eat more fat, but worse perhaps, I started to think I could eat it with impunity.  Once I realized I was slipping back into that old mentality, I pulled back.  But the experience let me know, once again, that I'm never going to be out of the woods.  Oh well, I guess I'll just have to live with that and stay vigilant.

Otherwise, I had a fairly successful week, though I'm still having trouble recording my eating.  I need to contemplate how to make that process more helpful so I'll keep up with it.  I'll try to do better this week and report my progress next weekend.

Until then . . .

Puttering Along at Week 55

Another two weeks of sticking mostly to the Learn to Be Thin plan: continued challenges to recording my food intake, but not too many challenges to my resolve.

I'm not sure what lessons to report from the interval, but I do find myself getting hungry again during the day, mostly mid-afternoon. I'm not really sure what to do about that, other than to try to eat food that sticks with me. I don't want to add more calories to my diet, since I get plenty, I think, and I'm losing weight slowly enough as it is.

Perhaps a higher protein breakfast would help . . . I may try that.  I could eat fish instead of cereal . . . hmmm. Maybe I'll buy some smoked salmon or some kipper snacks.  Or perhaps tuna would work.  I'll have to think about it some more.

I'm also starting to feel a little smug about my success.  I look around me at people who should be dieting, but aren't, and I congratulate myself for my ability to do what others seem unable to do.  Then I think: Well, if they'd just use my diet, they'd succeed too.  It's hard not to proselytize to the masses to try to convert them to my approach.  I guess that's how these born-again Christians feel about the transformative power of religion.  They really want people to feel good the way they do.  Ah well, people have to use what works for them, and since I can't control them, I'll just try to set a good example. 

What helps more than anything, though, I'm beginning to think, is writing this blog.  Because I have to report my progress, I try to have something good to report every week.  And because "someone" is waiting to hear about it, I know I can't stray too far from the path.  The Learn to Be Thin diet plan is a good one, but it's not easy to stick with.  Writing in this blog makes the "sticking to it" part easier, so it's one of the most useful tools I've come up with to make sure what I learn continues to help me get and stay slim.

Exercise is important, too, and helps increase my metabolism, or so I've read.  My husband makes sure we get our exercise (that's his bailiwick), so together we make a good team.  And he continues to make nutritious meals for us, another important tool for ensuring our success.

So I'm still puttering along, still losing, still learning to be thin.  See you next time!