Allergic to Sweets

I think Shirley was wrong about being able to control even your favorite foods, eating a small, normal, thin person's portion.  I used to believe it could be done, but now I know it can't, at least not for me. I'm going to stay at coping level 7 with all the sweets, chips, and other fatty foods. I can't have them around me, and that's that.

They'll be in the house, but I'll have to find a way to avoid those trigger foods.  I have to give them up forever. So when do I want to do this? Hah, that's the problem, isn't it?

But as with alcohol, certain foods trigger overeating--I could end up binging for days, weeks, even months, as I do every year at holiday time. It's so difficult to say no, though, even when what is offered is not appetizing at all. How insidious is this problem? Quite, considering the level of media blitz that is focused on consuming fattening foods.

One show: ad for M&Ms which starts out talking about lack of resistance to chocolate, and has a kind of dark edge to it--the M&M candies don't seem to know they will be eaten, and then that "eating" has a sexual connotation.

Wendy's ad: burgers with cheese that are spicy. Just a picture of the burgers, joke about fire, two-for-one sale to give you an excuse for eating there.  An Arby's commercial remarkably similar. Another Arby's commercial with a "big" fish sandwich with plenty of fatty tartar sauce and a bargain for incentive.

So, the marketers know what people are addicted to, and for most people it's fat and possibly also chocolate.  I can't control those things any more than an alcoholic can control whisky or wine.  I have no trouble sipping a beer and then putting the rest away for days or weeks.  If I had some cake or ice cream or candy, it would not last the night.  I don't feel about sweets the same way I feel about alcohol, and that tells me that there's something different about sweets and their effect on me.

I should think of myself as allergic to these kinds of food. Allergies can be thought of as a heightened sensitivity to the substance in the way that an allergy to bee stings or peanut butter can be. If I have a heightened sensitivity to chocolate, for instance, in that I receive an overly strong stimulus from it, can I consider that an allergy?  Maybe.

Post Turkey Day Test

Yesterday was Thanksgiving Day, and as tradition dictates, one overeats. It's a feast day and so I feasted. I didn't go as far overboard as I have in years past, but did have pie and ice cream and more fat than I usually have considering the green bean casserole with its French Fried Onions. The corn bread also added some fat as did the gravy and the eggnog.

But now the challenge becomes can I take a short detour and get back on the road quickly? This is the big problem and the reason that "the holidays" become October through February. We food addicts make a big excuse that carries us right through the holiday period--like a four-month pass that allows us to eat whatever we want. I'm going to try to thwart that impulse this year. If I do, the payoff will be in control and also in future short-term indulgences.

I know--I've tried this before to no avail. But I can't give up. What will my reward be? I have to think about that some. It should be something substantial. We'll see.

Meanwhile, I'm going to try to confine my overeating to supper time, but only because there is pie, casserole and eggnog left to eat.

Week One Is Done - Bring On the Next!

I did alright over the weekend--lost 3 lbs this week, but that's common at the beginning. I keep telling myself that the payoff is not in the food but in the control.

What shall I reward myself with this week? I'll have to think on it. Mostly I want to give myself time to do things I don't seem to have time to do normally. Indulgences I refrain from. We'll see.

Still Moving Forward, Avoiding the Ditch

I did pretty well today, although I did get hungry a bit during the afternoon.

I finished the new mystery I was reading as my reward. Now I have to come up with another one. I'll have to think on it.

I'm trying to avoid thinking that I'm depriving myself if I don't eat all the food available to me.  I have to keep telling myself that I don't need that payoff.  That it's not all it's cracked up to be.

The Hunger Dilemma

I was terribly hungry yesterday, but I persevered, mostly through eating an additional fruit. But I didn't go off my program so I felt proud and relieved when the day was over.

I've decided to reward myself with reading my mystery every day that I manage to get through without veering off.  So far it's working. I'm getting a payoff from refraining instead of from indulging.

Today I wasn't so hungry as yesterday. I wonder what causes the hunger? I didn't do anything different yesterday from what I did today or the day before yesterday. Maybe it's just a kind of withdrawal.  We'll see what happens one day at a time.

Attention to Detail

I had a good day yesterday--didn't encounter too many obstacles. I kept busy, maybe that's why.

I do find myself feeling burdened by the need to weigh and measure everything and spend so much time preparing food. I start to tell myself it's a big pain. And that's when I start to slack off on doing it.

I also want to slack off on recording, and sometimes I just forget. But it really does help. The constant attention to detail helps and is worth it. But it can be tiring sometimes.

Today I'm at work and feeling the usual hunger between meals. I try to stretch the time, though, so I can eat less or less often. So far, so good.

Windfall Treats: Wolves in Sheep's Clothing

Well, I'm happy to report I managed to get through one whole day (yesterday) without eating food I shouldn't. And the reason I was able to do so was that I avoided five occasions where I could have eaten but did not.

The first was at breakfast time when my husband suggested I have leftover ham with my egg. First, I imagined how good that ham would taste with the egg I was eating. Then, I tried to figure out how I could eat the ham without going off my eating plan. I didn't want to start right out blowing it, after all. After seeing that it was only 9 AM and that if I were to eat the ham it would have to come out of my lunch time protein allotment, and that in three hours I was going to be hungry again and would probably not be satisfied with a smaller amount of food, I decided I couldn't afford to indulge. So I just had my single egg with toast and juice and enjoyed it.

The second was a true windfall. While at the library I saw that cake was being offered to celebrate a library achievement (there are many for our wonderful library). It was ordinary looking cake, but I was kind of hungry having just walked about a mile to get to the library. I was sorely tempted. But then I remembered that I was not going to eat cake or other sweets that day, and said "No, thank you" to the young woman who was offering it.

I had brought an apple with me to eat if I got hungry on my walk, so after leaving the library I ate my apple and was satisfied with it until I got home.

The third was a typical dilemma for me--being hungry in the middle of the afternoon. Once I got home from the library it was 3 PM, still too early for dinner, so I had to eat something to tide me over until dinner. Having no bread or meat allotment, I chose to have celery with leftover milk from breakfast (in tea).  That worked for a while, but then dinner wasn't until 5 PM, so in another hour I had to have something else. I decided I should have the rest of my milk in some raspberries with a teaspoon of sugar (and added sweetener).  That kept me from being hungry until dinner. But I really wanted something more substantial. I get panicky when I'm hungry, but in truth I will be hungry every two hours no matter what I eat so eating just enough is preferable to eating something highly caloric.

The fourth eating occasion occurred when I was cooking dinner--choosing something that works with my diet is difficult if I'm hungry when I'm preparing it. I managed to make something tasty that was within the bounds of my plan, but I had to really concentrate on doing that and taking the extra time to weigh and measure everything to avoid "eyeballing" quantities that turn out to be too much, too late to do anything about it. When I'm in a hurry on the weekdays, it will be more of a challenge, I think.

The fifth occasion was when I prepared my nighttime snack. I had yogurt and pineapple, but when it came time to add granola, I wanted to add more than one tablespoon but did not. It turned out that one was plenty and I felt virtuous and also satisfied.

So, it looks like each day is fraught with peril.  Just getting through the day, I feel like Frogger trying to get home having to avoid obstacles like speeding cars or alligators. (For those of you too young to remember, Frogger was an early video game.)


Frogs trying to get home, some (red) not making it

The rewards are great if I can successfully navigate the treacherous passage to eating control.  But since the ultimate payoff is way down the road, I'm going to start rewarding myself for each of the perils I avoid each day.  Yesterday I earned 5 credits.  That's enough for an hour of mystery reading! We'll see what today brings.

Until then . . .